Let Go Of The Fillers, Own Your Voice

Hey there… Zoe here.

First of all, let me say I am very excited at the progress we are making. On the surface, it looks like we are taking baby steps, but I promise you that as we keep applying and imbibing them on a regular basis, these steps are total game changers for how you present and communicate.

So let’s take it a step further and I’d like to ask you this.

Have you ever listened to a recording of yourself speaking?

Not reading the news and not presenting on camera… I mean just you in a normal conversation with a friend, a colleague or a family member.

If you have, chances are, you noticed something. There were probably lots of “um…”, “you know…, “so… or even “like… like… like…”

For others it might be words or phrases like…” you get me…” ,”do you understand…”,”basically…”… and the list goes on…

And yes, you probably sound like that…..

Welcome to what I’d like to call… “Filler Word Syndrome.’

It’s more widespread than you think and you may not even realise how much of filler words they use in their day-to-day communication.

Filler words are those little sounds or words we use, often unconsciously, when we’re thinking about what to say next. It’s our brains trying to find the next word to say, which is relevant to the subject of discussion. These words don’t add any meaning to your message; they just fill the space while your brain is trying to catch up.

Now, I am not saying that using filler words are bad, but they just take away from your presentation and make it less meaningful than it should be. And since we are aspiring to be the best in the art of presentation and communication, it will serve us to reduce or even eliminate filler words in our conversations

So, why do we use filler words so much?

Well, firstly, we are thinking while speaking. Now, unlike writing, where you can pause and edit, speaking happens in real time. So your brain is processing and producing at the same time.

Secondly, we are trying to eliminate Silence. Experiencing a pause when we talk can feel very awkward, so instead of pausing, we seek to fill those gaps with something.

And thirdly, we want to sound fluent and in control. We try to “keep talking” so we don’t lose flow. Sadly, these filler words make us sound less mature and not very much in control.

The thing about filler words is that they make you sound less confident, break the flow of your message, distract your listeners, and sometimes make you annoying to listen to and harder to understand.

So, how do we start reducing them? Well, I have good News for you.

You probably won’t “eliminate” filler words overnight. But there are intentional steps you can take to get rid of them and own your voice. You just need to become aware of them and then replace them with something better.

So what we are going to do is to pay greater attention to our speech. Even better is that we record ourselves during a normal conversation or when we are explaining something. We then listen back to our recording and identify what our specific ‘filler words’ are and how frequently we used them in a sentence or phrase.

Next, we Replace Filler Words with Silence. I know that sounds counter-intuitive and uncomfortable, but it works. So instead of saying “I think we should try“ Umm… …say this instead… “I think we should try:…[pause]….

You see that pause?… Instead of making you sound awkward, it actually makes you sound more thoughtful and in control.

Next, Slow Down Your Speech. A lot of filler words come from rushing, and so your brain is trying to keep up… and in the process throws ‘filler words’ in as a buffer. But when you slow down, even slightly, you give yourself time to think and speak more clearly.

Lastly, practice Structured Thinking. That means, before you speak, especially in important moments, take a second to organize your thoughts by determining your main point. That simple step reduces the need to “figure things out” while talking.

Here’s something I want you to remember. Verbal Fluency is not about speaking fast but about speaking clearly, calmly, and intentionally. And the moment you start replacing noise with intention, your communication level shifts immediately.

This Week’s Practice Tip:

Today, try this simple exercise:

In one conversation, consciously replace every “um…” (your filler word…) with a short pause. It may feel strange at first… but listen to how much more confident you begin to sound. Before long, filler words will be absent from your vocabulary.

Please let me know in the comments what your most common filler word is. We all have one or two.

I’ll see you soon, till then, keep it simple, keep it clear, and own your voice.

Love,

Zoe McDarlington